I think I have mentioned before that my Mom is a huge fan of purchasing socks, underwear, and pajamas for me.

Her most recent purchases included martini socks and hot pink fleece adult footed pajamas adorned in skulls. Armani loves when I rock the pajamas.

She also likes to purchase random shit for me assuming I need or want it.

I figured I would share some of her most recent purchases.

A Cafe Latte maker. I am unsure what this little gadget does. The box says something about adding ice cream and coffee?

Life is already complicated enough. I do not need an additional gadget to feed my caffeine addiction, or do I?

Air Mattresses. I was a little confuzzled with this purchases, as I have a click-bed in the extra bedroom for overnight visitors which we rarely have. Our overnight visitors consist of my younger brother’s friends who are too intoxicated to drive home. Its rare that they even make it to the couch in the living room. They usually just fall asleep on the kitchen floor or on a chaise in the backyard with a beer in their hand. I questioned the reason for this purchases. She figured we could use them for the pool. Are you serious? We have a 12×18 pool and

A single CD of Britney Spears “Hit me baby one more time” What? When I asked why she bought this, she responded “Look how young she is!” CONVERSATION ENDED.

A small plaque that says “Do not trust a man that doesn’t drink”. I am thinking she just liked this and couldn’t have it at her house because my stepdad doesn’t drink. This is what I figure, who knows if that is
indeed the case.

Bulk sized containers of Jelly Beans, Jolly Ranchers and Pretzels. I am not complaining. I will take them.

After a recent trip to Armani’s Mom’s house we came home with a few random items and a few random items that were sneakily snuck into our bag before we left. I quickly learned my Mom isn’t the only mother who likes to give random nonsense. We have a new CD/radio alarm clock, with dual alarms. We wake up to a Santana song played by
a Hawaiian coverband.

Can you ever leave your parent’s house without random nonsense and leftover food?

NO, this post does not pertain to any type of baby making for me.  QUIET with that nonsense.  I am finally doing okay, not mentally breaking down that is with the fact that Armani has moved in with me!!!  Yes, indeed I am in my 1st adult relationship and dealing with it one freak-out after another but hey I am dealing with it right?  It also helps that I love every ounce of him with every ounce of my beating heart.

Back to the baby business… Armani’s older sister is expecting her first baby, which is a boy in case that matters.  I was thinking of getting her one of these nursing bracelets which can be found here but then I found a digital reminder thingy which can be found here.

I am torn.  I like how simplistic and sentimental the bracelet is but then the baby care timer looks so much more efficient?

Thoughts?

Life has been crazy.  It’s been a mixture of different types of crazy.

I am crazy in love with Armani. You know what they say… there comes a point in life where you just get it.  I just get it.  I believe.

The homestead is just getting settled but there is a reason a little flag hangs in front of the house reading “Welcome to the NUT HOUSE” with squirrels in a fall scene.  L and I have gotten into numerous heated fights.  In conclusion to that little saga… we will never be friends again.  I will be cordial seeing she is my brother’s girlfriend of 10 years but it will stop there.

I am currently at my Mom’s house sharing a king bed with her for the night because my younger brother is gone for the weekend celebrating his 10 year DATING anniversary with L, Uncle is in the hospital - hoping its nothing too serious but he is in severe pain in his pancreas, and Armani has a birthday party to attend. I still cannot fathom staying at home alone.  I know I can do it but I would rather not.  It’s difficult enough for me sleeping without Armani and I cannot imagine sleeping without Armani and in an empty house.

Oh ya did I mention Armani drives over 1 hour and 20 minutes to sleep with me almost nightly and then wakes to drive to work which is 1 hour and 20 minutes away.  He is indeed crazy.  I am really looking forward to the day, which I hope is very soon that he drives home from work to OUR home.  I am planning on moving out after I hopefully land a job.  Lets keep our fingers crossed???!!!

I’m ready to grow up.  I know sleeping with my Mom doesn’t quite support that fact but I am.  I need to grow.  I cannot grow in the household that I am currently in.

GONE!

I planned on this weekend being very laid back and alcohol free but it was quite the opposite.  I was still rather sickiez on Friday so the prospect, who needs a new nickname, came by to play Monopoly.  I purchased a few Subway sandwiches for dinner.  I could pick apart my tuna on wheat to get some nutrition in my failing body.  Seriously.  I had to nibble on it like a gerbil eating a cardboard box.  I hate the dentist, teeth, and extractions.

The thing about me is I have a very short attention span.  Although I have never been diagnosed or treated for ADD there is no doubt in my mind that its just another mental illness that you can label me with.  The prospect has the same issue.  Its not unusual for us to go swimming, walk Bacci, watch a few minutes of Borat, and play Scattegories all in less than an hour.

Where is this going?  Oh… We didnt come close to finishing our game of Monopoly but the prospect had the great idea of putting the board away with our properties and monies seperated so we can resume it at another time.  We will finish this game the ADD way

I spent the majority of Saturday with the family.  My 9 year old brother is once again kicking ass in All Star Little League baseball so I enjoyed a rather mild weathered game in Chicago.  Seriously.  I do not remember a time when air conditioning was not a must in the month of July in Chicago.

The prospect and I went to my Mom’s house for a Spaghetti & Meatball dinner.  She had one too many glasses of wine.  I didnt get too mad because I am sure she was trying to numb the anxiety of meeting the prospect.  Things went swimmingly and we retreated early as we had plans to see Bruno.

On our way to Bruno the prospect asked me if I really wanted to see Bruno right now.   My ADD ass of course said “nahhhh” and the next thing ya know we are outside at a neighborhood bar drinking Bacardi and Diets.  Plans are not an option for us.  After a couple of drinks we retreated home to continue drinking a gallon of Bacardi.

The night ended with sex.  I do believe I had more sex on Saturday night than I have ever had in my life combined.

Seriously.

Cheers to good sex!

I am anxious.  I had first felt it was the full bottle of Red Line I consumed on an empty stomach, which in fact it probably was, but I am also anxious as my Mom, Stepdad, Babi Sister, and Babi Brother are indeed moving out tomorrow and in turn they will be leaving me.

I know I am not helpless.

The sweet in the bittersweet?

Finally, life can become more settled rather than boxed up and in limbo.  We can all move on to better and bigger chapters of our lives.

The bitter in the bittersweet?

Change.  Change scares me and they always have.  Change is good.  Life without change is boring.  All true but easier said than to believe.

Family is everything to me.  I fear that now with me living separately from my family and both younger brothers living separately, things will change or liquidate.  The conversations we once had in person will become telephone calls and the telephone calls will soon become emails and the emails will soon become Facebook messasges.

As the door closes and I find myself in a much emptier house to sleep in, I must remember that the change is what I make of it.  Having a close knit family takes work and love.  I am not losing anyone but rather creating more challenging relationships with them.

Is it FLOW RIDA or FLOW RIDER?

I have been all over the place as of late.  I had high expectations for myself that I felt would start the moment my plane landed at Ohare from my fanfuckingtastic trip to Vegas.  I had plans to catch up on my reader, add the numerous awesome people I had met to my reader, get a job, paint the garage, paint my bedroom, buy new furniture, rekindle friendships with a couple of friends… Alright, I am going to stop now because I haven’t really accomplished much of anything.  My life has been up in the air.  Perhaps this is why I did not want to leave Vegas and felt that we had a bond.  Vegas is pretty much “up in the air”.  We got along well.

Reality Shmality.  Who needs it?  Perhaps I need it.

I will be held responsible for my living expenses and bills before the end of the summer.   Unlike past plans I had which entailed leaving the nest, the nest will be leaving me.  It’s a confusing little situation but my Mom, Stepdad, 9 yo Brother, and 15 yo Sister are moving and leaving me in charge of myself and bills such as electric, gas, and cable.  The nerve huh?

Say it, “huh?”

Ya, I don’t expect you to get it right now because I told you a blip of the story.  I can’t be bothered getting into the deets as they are dull and boring.  All you have to know is I will be sharing this here house with my Uncles, one being drunk and the other disabled.

Now that we all understand my living situation maybe next entry will be dedicated to the prospect I mentioned in my previous post.

I havent blogged as long as I havent shaved my legs which happens to be quite some time. No worries Vegas chickies, I plan on shaving them just for you!!

For serious…

Seeing I haven’t blogged my head is full of anything and everything but my life has not been that exciting.  More like lack luster.

My 15 year old sister received her driving learning permit last week.  She is now officially my chauffeur.  Its beyond cute seeing her struggle with road rage at such a young age.  She just turned 15 in April.  I will have this broad on the highway by next week and parallel parking by July.  I vow my Mom’s generation will be the last generation in my family that doesn’t drive on highways, over 55 mph, or out of a 5 mile square radius. 

What irks me?  Swine flu now being referred to as H1N1. 

I tweeted I would blog and I did.  Its off to whiten my chompers and pack for Vegas.

I have never smoked.  Well, besides a few puffs on cigars at Festa Italiana.  A fine italian woman, glass of pinot, and a cigar.  I’m perfect. Kidding!

Anyhow… D, my 19 year old brother, stopped by on Thursday to borrow my ID for his girlfriend to use on their trip to Panama City.  They are in Panama City as I type this. Lucky bastards. 

Oh ya… back to the question at hand. 

He asked me for a paper cup for his spit.  He has traded cigarettes for chewing tobacco. Ya, not so bright. I’ve told him of all of the cancers he is putting himself at risk of and blah blah blah. 

Oh ya… back to the question at hand. 

He told me the “buzz” from the tobacco was longer than the buzz he got from smoking a cigarette.

People get a buzz from smoking cigarettes?  I’m confused.

I will be spending Saturday with Thing 1 and Thing 2.  Thing 1 is my 5 year old sister and Thing 2 is my 9 year old sister.  I have been recruited to look after them and keep them out of the house as my Dad is moving.  Are there any good kid movies out in the theatre?  Do you have any ideas of other things we can do?  I have to keep them out of my the house as I hear munchkins running around are dangerous on moving day.

Help!